The Nightmare Before Christmas: The Mummy (1999)

Okay, I feel like this one is cheating a little bit, but when I tried to watch my first pick Netflix was flaking out so I was limited to the DVDs that were on hand in my sister's apartment. But it's a remake of a horror film and, while it amps up the action/adventure aspects, still has elements of horror so I'm counting it.

Live reactions:

  • Arnold Vosloo is a handsome devil. I can see why Anck-su-Namun went for him.
  • Though not why her torso makeup looks like scales.
  • Why does she get to wear clothes when she's dead, but not when she was alive?
  • What was it about Beni's previous abandonment that made you think he wouldn't shut you out in the cold, O'Connell?
  • Shai-Hulud comes!
  • Yes, let the cute one go. Leaving someone with the knowledge of Hamunaptra's location alive could never come back to bite you.
  • The Mummy is the only film that's given me recurring nightmares. Of knocking over shelves in a library or bookstore.
  • O'Connell cleans up very well. For a scoundrel.
  • This is cursed. That is cursed.
  • Goodbye, Beni.
  • The Americans are certainly happy about the chance to play cowboy and shoot things.
  • Yes, let the natives whose history you're destroying with your hamhanded treasure hunting run the risk of dying.
  • Omid Djalili just read some Supernatural spoilers and decided to run into a wall and die.
  • "Death will come on swift wings to whomsoever opens this chest." Let's open it.
  • Arnold Vosloo isn't looking so handsome at the moment. He is gooey, but not in a fun sexual way.
  • Fez guy has always confused me. He seems to care about knowledge, but he's hanging out with these cowboy treasure seekers and doesn't do anything useful.
  • "No harm ever came from reading a book." Obviously she is unfamiliar with horror movies.
  • A cat! My mortal enemy.
  • Arnold Vosloo can suck me dry any time he wants.
  • Though I'm going to have to insist that he not eat bugs while in my bed. That's just unacceptable behaviour.
  • Fine, if Evy wants to kiss him so badly she can tag along too.
  • Ah, the return of the burrowing flesh-eating scarabs. Those things are so creepy. But Jonathan survives it because he's not greedy comic relief brown guy.
  • Manacles. Kinky.
  • Oh, look, now some main characters are opening a thing underneath a statue. Fortunately, they're not extras so this one doesn't have a pressurized salt acid trap to melt their faces.
  • One of the great things about the climax is that everyone gets their hero moment, including Jonathan.
  • And then the incantation removes the ka, leaving only the messy mortal bits behind to be slain. IT ALL MAKES SENSE.
  • Now...kiss.
  • Death is only the beginning.

Post-movie postmortem: I've watched this movie so very many times and it's still fun. It's the perfect mix of action, adventure, romance, and, yes, horror. Maybe a bit too reliant on jump scares, but there's some genuinely horrific moments in there as well.

Five stars.